Many people try hard to please their family, especially over the holidays, as their loved one’s happiness is often at the top of their list.
But guess what? You can still set boundaries with them (and you might need to) so you can protect your own mental health and both of you enjoy the holidays.
Here’s how :
1. Know what you want and don’t want this season and communicate this to the important people in your life.
2. Stay within these boundaries - stay home, leave early, say no, etc. know what impacts you and doesn’t based on past years. Do a little reflection on past holiday seasons. Family gatherings can be physically and emotionally exhausting and it's ok to acknowledge this.
3. Take stock of everyone's needs and expectations in your family. Have a little sit down and discuss what matters most to people and spend some time getting on the same page.
4. Ask for support from others to stay accountable to taking care of yourself.
You don’t need to make up for anything as a parent this year and a certain gift won’t be sending the right message anyway. We all want to make our children happy but going above and beyond with gift buying doesn't teach our children how to prioritize or make trade offs. They do not get a chance to feel disappointment. No one can have everything they want in life.
Listen to what YOU want instead of letting external expectations drag you in all directions. The holidays can feel like a huge work project. Many of our clients tell us they feel there are so many people to please.
It does not feel relaxing at all...it feels more like a lot of stress and worry about others' opinions or letting others down and how that makes them feel. There is another way to look at this.
Your mental health and well-being should be your priority. Your children will thank you for taking care of you as you will show up for them in the healthiest way. Stay more peaceful this holiday season - and give yourself the gift of setting boundaries. Sometimes you just have to try it and see how effective it can be..
We're here if you want to talk :)
Take the first step and call us for an appointment ...(506) 651-1239