The Most Underrated Forms of Self-Care: The Little Things I’m Working On
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about self-care — not the polished versions we see online, but the quieter, often uncelebrated choices that actually help us feel a little more human.
Anyone who knows me would know that I’m still a work in progress when it comes to slowing down and resting, especially while being in what feels like a very busy season of life. But lately, I’ve been noticing that it’s the small, almost invisible habits that are making the biggest difference. Maybe they'll help you too!
1. Giving Myself Extra Time
I’ve started giving myself an extra 10–15 minutes to get somewhere and booking twice as much time for things than I think I will need. It sounds small, but it’s shocking how much calmer I feel when I’m not rushing quite as much. When you’re rushing — heart racing, mind spinning, feeling behind — your nervous system goes into a stress response (fight, flight or freeze). Your body releases cortisol and adrenaline, your heart rate increases, and your brain interprets the situation as a threat (“We’re late! Danger!”).
But when you give yourself extra time and move at a comfortable pace, your body stays in a regulated state — meaning your breathing is steady, your heart rate is normal and your mind feels clearer. You’re more present, grounded and able to respond instead of react.
So “not running late” isn’t just a nice habit — it’s literally an act of self-regulation. It helps keep your nervous system from getting stuck in a stress loop, which over time can make a huge difference in your overall well-being.
2. Saying No Without Explaining
For a lot of us, saying no feels uncomfortable because we’re so used to over-explaining, softening it, or trying to make sure no one’s upset with us.
I’ve been practicing shorter, more direct answers:
“That doesn’t work for me.”
“I’m not available for that.”
“No, thank you.”
At first, it feels awkward — almost rude — but it’s actually a sign of emotional maturity. It’s trusting that your boundaries are valid, even if someone else doesn’t fully understand them. You don’t owe a justification to protect your peace.
Because every time you over-explain, you’re really trying to manage someone else’s feelings instead of honouring your own limits. And that’s exhausting.
3. Getting Outside Every Day
Lately, I’ve been making it a point to go outside at least once a day — even if it’s after dark, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Sometimes I walk around the block; other times I just stand on the porch and take a few deep breaths.
It’s a small habit, but it’s like hitting a reset button for my body and brain. The air, the sounds, even the feeling of the ground under my feet — they remind me that there’s a world outside my thoughts and to-do lists. It’s a way to come back to myself, to slow down just enough to notice that I’m still here, still breathing, still okay.
4. Taking Pride in Small Progress
I used to measure progress by how far I was from my goal. Now, I see it as the difference between where I started and where I am now. When I actually stop and notice how far I’ve come, it changes everything.
It’s easy to overlook the small wins — the mornings you got out of bed when you didn’t want to, the moments you paused before reacting, the days you kept going when no one was watching. Those things count.
All this to say, it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking, "Once I get this right, I’ll finally feel balanced." But I’m realizing that self-care isn’t something to master; it’s something to practice. Some days it sticks, some days it doesn’t. What matters is showing up for yourself anyway and trying again tomorrow.
If part of your self-care is making time to go to therapy, we have a team of people who can help you implement things like this. Reach out to us!
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